"An imagined kiss is more easily controlled, more thoroughly enjoyed, and less cluttery than an actual kiss. To kiss in dream is wholly pleasant. First, the woman is one of your selection, not just anyone who happens to be in your arms at the moment. Second, the deed is garnished with a little spring of glamour which the mind, in exquisite taste, contributes. Third, the lips, imaginatively, are placed just so, the right hand is placed just so, the concurrent thoughts arrive, just so."
-E.B. White, Is Sex Necessary?
And so with that my masturbation addiction is fully justified.